No Dice

No luck over in this corner. I honestly thought I would be pregnant by now. We have timed it right 3 times now without any luck and we weren’t even trying when I got pregnant the first time. Maybe that’s a sign to back off in the monitoring. I used OPKs once. I’m now only taking my temp and checking my cervical fluid, but maybe I should stop. I’ve confirmed I’m ovulating, what’s the point of continuing? For me, I’m looking for a way to control something that is out of my hands. I hate not being in control and the temping lets me feel like I’ve got a little. My hubby thinks I should just relax and let it happen since we at least know we can get pregnant. I just feel like there’s no guarantee that getting pregnant means having a healthy baby. Alas, that is also out of my control. So hard to deal with.

One of my best friends just had a whoops and is pregnant with her 3rd after just giving birth 9 months ago. She’s super bummed out and is sort of hoping for a miscarriage. She’s had 2 in her life. I would give anything for that to be my baby. It’s so crazy how people can have such different feelings toward the same thing. I was so excited when she told me (I asked the right questions or I probably wouldn’t know yet, it’s only 8 weeks). She was so bummed. I tried to cheer her up and say maybe we would both have September babies! That obviously didn’t happen as I am currently on my period. I’m still excited for her and hoping we will have our babies close together so they’ll be the same age! I’m dying to have a friend with a baby close in age.

It’s scary because I’m coming up on my original due date in 6 weeks and I truly thought I’d be pregnant by now. Not that it’ll make it any easier but at least I’d have something to be happy about when it comes. We only have one more try for that to happen. Although I’ll probably freak out if it does. Also, my friend is having her baby in 2 weeks and we would have been pregnancy buddies. I’m super excited to meet her baby but I’m a little scared of my emotions and feelings getting out of whack.

Even though this is pretty negative, I feel pretty good most of the time. I feel pretty confident it’ll happen when the time is right. I’m doing my best to cut down on alcohol and sugar, and I’ve also reduced my dairy intake. I’ve been ramping up my running and it feels so good to be working out again. And of course I bought some robitussin to possibly try out this month. It makes me feel crazy and it probably won’t make a difference but why not? Although more than likely I’ll chicken out and not use it. Lastly, I ovulated on day 18 instead of day 21 last cycle so I’m hoping that trend will continue this month.

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One thought on “No Dice

  1. Eventual Momma

    It will happen for you. I know how it feels to want it so badly and it not be happening. Im not going to tell you to relax because relaxing isnt really going to make all that much of a difference. I will say that even though everything can line up perfectly with timing, there may be an issue with sperm meeting egg. Good lick

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    Reply

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